The Linguistics Learner

It had been a wonderful summer break for Jack, and he was very grateful to have made lots of friends and solved a lot of crimes. But it was better for his body’s scruples with Ernie, and the air conditioning was comfortable. 

Plus, he’d gotten into the Linguistics 101 after-school club. 

After a long day at school, Jack couldn’t wait to get to the new club.

He entered a classroom with his friends Jim and Henry.

There they found Mr. Morgenbesser. As the class went on, he became very full of himself.

“Jim.” he hissed. “How many people speak Busuu?”

Jim replied. “8.”

“Wrong! 3 people speak it as of 2005.”

“Henry! What is the shortest grammatically correct sentence?”

“I don’t know.”

“Stupid boy! It is “GO!””

But there was one student Mr. Morgenbesser could not beat. 

Jack.

“What is the longest word in English?”

“Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis.”

“Who invented 1700 words?”

“William Shakespheare.”

“In English,” Mr. Morgenbesser said, “a double negative forms a positive. However, in some languages, such as Russian, a double negative remains a negative. But there isn’t a single language, not one, in which a double positive can express a negative.”

He sat back, undoubtedly pleased with this factoid.

Jack raised his hand 

He said-

WHAT?